You cannot run away from weakness.
I kinda felt YF camp went by really fast this year. Or maybe it's just me. But either way, I thank God for this episode of my December 2010. Even though the camp theme was Be Still, I couldn't find myself at peace throughout the camp. But I still learnt, and am thankful for that. And I'm convicted by how I've conformed to the normal ways of this world, how easily I've swayed in my Christian walk. It wasn't a pleasant feeling to be admonished like that, but I thank God because as I was telling someone yesterday, there are always learning lessons to be taken away. In this case, I learn the hard way. Forgiveness. I daresay I'm guilty of one of those people who claim to forgive, yet obstinately cling on to all the bitterness and hurt others may have caused me. Who can really say they are gracious enough to forgive without remembering the price that comes along with it? I marvel at the Lord's mercy and grace. Praise God!
Anyway, apart from the messages, devotions, discussions and workshop, I guess what struck me most were the struggles I see some of my friends going through, as well as their reaction to it. Really, when you step outside yourself, and see them for who they are, you start to see their real selves. And whether you like what you see of them, that's besides the point because the people and their lives don't change to suit your needs. God made them that way, we can choose to accept them, or not. We can choose to learn from them, or not. We can choose to love them, or not. But I'm truly thankful, because God gave me the opportunity to know so many more people on a deeper level, and He gave me the desire to love them. Maybe that's because they by themselves are lovable, or maybe not. But either way, I know I care a lot for them. And that's why I'm so burdened by their burdens, so troubled by their troubles. Of course, when I said I felt no peace, I know it's because I kept it all to myself- all my disappointments, all my bewilderment and uncertainty, all my pain and anguish. Talking to Aaron on the last night was really God's way of speaking to me, and of course His soft prompting to find refuge nowhere but in Christ. I thank God for the talk was totally unintended, but apt and timely.
Okay. I have to say that this year's games were gratifying, the spiritual lessons behind them were appropriate. Hmm.. of all the games, I guess I like reverse whacko the best teehee! Hahaha it was hilarious and I didn't expect myself to get targeted at but then again, it's all in the name of fun! The 'dirty' games were fun too, especially the bowling station reallyyyyy cooool. Thank you games comm! :}
Haha, like I said, I'm glad to have grown closer to most people. Even if it means I'm always the joke, which can at times make it difficult to get my point across 'cause nobody takes me seriously!!! :((( Thanks to Tim Loe, Josiah Tan, Caritas AND HUIXIAN! Hahaa, sLim was nice enough to 'be cool' and not add fuel to the fire, good friend! HAHA. Okay and you know how they say things spread really fast, especially awful things. I shall not specify what because that will only encourage more people to suan me -.- HAHA AND PS, THIS IS NOT A FAIL BLOG! LOL so other than the above people, there are Mel Loe, Stella, Eunice, Aaron, Josiah Seah, Joanne, NADIA (even though she only came for one day) and TAB LEE (hahaha thankfully we DID spent time, even though it was lesser than I expected :(( ). Oh on the last night we had STEAMBOAT which was really NOT BAD AT ALL, thank God! Haha most of the J1s came and I'm really glad because we get to catch up, even if just for a while. And Rachel was sick yet so hilarious that day Tab and I can't stop laughing! She was practically commenting on the size and shape of a grape with a totally dreamy expression. Okay, maybe it's the medication HAHA.
Yup there are many others I'm really glad I got to know and talk to too, and I guess it really was a great way to end off the year 2010 with a God-given blessing like this. For the record, the start of 2011 wasn't too bad as well! In fact, I would say, awesome! But then again, it's how we finish it that matters, no?
Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Psalms 46:10
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