What if one day you woke up and you are not angry anymore?
Where do you draw the line between caring and caring too much?
And when should you stop?
The human brain with multiple complexities often have the ability to drive us mad, but most of the time we still stay sane. Perhaps because every time we allow ourselves to fall captive to the truest desire deep down, even if it's almost unattainable, reality slaps us hard in the face. But sometimes, it's God's way of pulling us back on track.
This feeling, is it sadness? When I witness so many betrayals of all kinds, even the most trivial and seemingly insignificant ones happening to the people around me... Relationships of all kinds, friends, family ties, etc... how can they be so strong yet so fragile at the same time? But when I look at myself I don't feel in a position to feel sorry for others because I have become a victim of what I allowed to happen to me. Anyway, I sincerely wish for my closed ones to be happy, and even for those who are not. Just, be happy. From the bottom of my heart.
Maybe, only time will tell if those words you say mean something, anything at all. I know the importance of actions, but still I unknowingly grow so used to believing in the things you say. What will happen in the future, the near future even? But even at this moment, contemplating all of this makes me despise myself. I shouldn't even be entertaining these thoughts that go through my head... how lousy of me :(
So when do you know, if what you are doing is right or wrong?
I honestly don't know.
OKAY. I survived on 3 hours of sleep yesterday, and so hopefully tonight I'll get sufficient sleep! This means it's time to continue mugging for SEA History, which is officially gonna become history tomorrow heehee can't wait! Pray I end well :) OH, that should be left for next Mon...Econs paper 2 my LAST A LEVEL PAPER BWAHAHAHA. Can't imagine this given my current mood but... I'll be preparing to fly to Korea next week this time hehhhh :}
On a side note, I made a mental note not to talk about my A level papers that are over (obviously because I didn't think they went so well.... :/ ) haha but I just feel that I ought to give thanks nevertheless. To even come so far... thank God for sustenance! Admittedly, I'm scared to the core at the thought of receiving the result next year (omg maggggg grrr haha.) BUT I will press on and continue trusting Him, my anchor :) His plans for me are greater than the oceans and mountains. Heehehehee!
