There are ways of dying that don't end in funerals, types of death you can't smell. 

To perish in lonely frustration.

I have come to the realisation that all I have, or used to think I have is but vapour. I don't know how to be strong when I'm so broken, when everything I know or love is breaking into a million pieces beyond restoration. I don't even know what to believe now. I can't come to terms with what I've learnt, or what I've been told by many. I can't see where I'm heading, or what I'm doing anymore. I muster every ounce of morality in me to acknowledge that nobody owes us anything. Not the world, not our parents, and definitely not God. In retrospect we owe our parents, we owe God. But I look at myself now and I question so many things. Outrageous and ungrateful thoughts I know I shouldn't be thinking, yet they have never left my mind of late. My existence, my dreams, me. What do I have? What do I have to offer? I don't have a right to be angry and bitter and resentful of what they did, who they are to me, or even the reason behind it all. I don't have a right, simply because I am undeserving. It is with so great a hope that I built my life upon, and with God's bountiful grace I entrust myself to, that all I have come to face now is appearing to strangle every breath out of me for the very fact that suddenly, all doors are closing in my face. I'm losing sight of the spark inside me. I'm losing myself.

I can only pray for God to show me His way, but how long more?

Talk Alien.

These few days I haven't given you much thought. But when I do, I don't feel like how I used to feel anymore. This departure may be sooner than I had expected, but nonetheless foreseen. I have no cause to feel so marooned. I am happy, or so I think, and this moment is what counts.



"But now you know there was a man named Jack Dawson and that he saved me… in every way that a person can be saved. I don’t even have a picture of him. He exists now… only in my memory."

Best movie of all time in my opinion :')

"Life is short and opportunities are rare. And we have to be vigilant in protecting them and not only the opportunities to succeed but the opportunities to laugh, to see the enchantment and to live.
Because life doesn't owe us anything.
In fact I think we owe something to the world."

With Arms Outstretched

Hi babe, remember last night? That will be how we spend our nights forever and more. Don't for one second doubt that. Goosebumps much? Hehe I don't care. You are probably smiling like a retarde now anyways bwahaha! I'm glad you are intoxicated by my skin deep touching letter (HAHA), and I wish I had a camera to capture your sappy moment assuming you were on the verge of bawling. Haha you know I love you! :}

Oh one more thing, you know I'll always be here for you with arms outstretched, and this time round, it's not anyone's arms but mine hahaha. (you get it.) I better see yours too whenever I need a hug or more (like squeezing your arm fats hahahaha!) Okay I take back my words. You are so gonna get slender arms soon anyway ;) *Inside joke teehehehe. What are friends for? :)

Lastly, I miss school days with you.