It's a joy to be studying something that you genuinely like. Often people forget that until it's too late. Other times they fail to recognize what they truly want for themselves. I know because I have found myself in both situations. But right now I'm just happy where I am.

I love studying in peace- something I never expected myself to say one year back. After all, who loves studying?

But intelligence is always attractive. And studying is more gratifying than many people know. And some never will.

It took me so much to remember.

On another note, recent subtle events have made me realize how much I miss actually being good at something, how much I miss doing something I completely derive pleasure from, how much I miss knowing the kind of person I wanna be.  

I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do.  -Helen Keller

You won't lose anything you don't have.

Take deep breaths and only remember what's really important.

Don't rely on anyone to fill in that void. If you haven't realize, people often let people down.

People always leave.

I don't know why it should affect me, but it does.

But, be well.

Skipper.

“But I’ve done a lot. I have no regrets. I’d love to win the Premier League. I still have that hunger. But I also know I have to be realistic and it could be I’m no longer playing when this club win the league again. But what do I do? It would be easy to say I want to leave. That I’ve had enough of this club. But I haven’t had enough. I want more.” - Steven Gerrard

RESPECT. :')

“There is no refuge from memory and remorse in this world. The spirits of our foolish deeds haunt us, with or without repentance.” -- Gilbert Parker

“But the eyes are blind. One must look with the heart.”

The things we see and hear around us everyday, the people we cross paths with, the places we have been to... have you ever wondered if they are all interconnected in some ways or another? That maybe, they are just small little pieces of puzzles that fit into a magnificient picture? One so great you never even dared imagine. Sometimes, I feel this way. Other times, I can't help feeling that they are like vapor that evaporates and never meant to be part of anything significant. Yet always it is only after having experienced how insignificant every encounter and trial is and every relationship turns out to be that we learn this lesson, that my vision starts to clear. Why?

Why? is never a question meant to be answered, but nobody seems to get it. Everyone wants to know the reason, the answer. And until we find out it appears that we can never rest.

As if knowing the truth can give us peace.

Probably. But it comes at a costly price and after a long time of healing. Because I guess the truth always hurts? Cliches are there for a reason.

Just a question for reference: Do people grow close to one another only due to circumstances? In a way, are they being "forced" to laugh with each other, to please one another, to go through thick and thin, to weather through the storm, to face difficulties, to have fun together, but only in a given context? Take that away, will those close friends remain close? If the answer is a resounding yes, then they are probably the pieces that will form your big picture, people who make you complete. And if no, then won't they fall into the latter? Vapor that was once essential, purposeful for a given occasion, but eventually evaporates, leaving nothing. Oh and how about those who smile at you as genuinely as you make them out to be and laugh with you so much, so hard that strangers envy, but are secretly filled with contempt when they regard you plainly? You know, we often buy into the ideas that others plant into our hearts- that we are special, but if we have the ability to read minds, we probably realize how pathetic and miserably wrong we are- that we are as insignificant as any other in their sight.


If we have to live our life with our guards up and defenses so strong, what then, is life? A weary, dark, strategic game that can never bring contentment and joy, possibly? And because of that, we come up with lies to eliminate any possibility of being hurt, and we accept them for what they are. But as for me, I don't wanna live like this.

Maybe I used to, but right now I want to stay true to myself. And I want to be happy.

That is why true friends are hard to come by. Never let them go.

Cherish your friends. Trust your instincts. Pray to God. :-)

“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.”